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Do They Control You?

Posted by Stephanie Harrison on

So this is not the way I had planned today’s post to go.  It was supposed to be lighthearted fun, funny, full of Holiday Outfits….but today something (GOD) just kept nudging me in a different direction.  I kept fighting it all day, I would sit down to type and usually my fingers go “a hundred” when I begin typing, but nothing, I couldn’t even get a proper start.  This was all that was on my mind:

 As I sit here at my desk, if you would call it that, most might call it a tiny space squished between 2 other co-workers, with a mountain of clothing all around.  And I may or may not have a pile of papers and junk surrounding my tiny space…Anyway, conditions are not most favorable, by any means, but we make it work.  There is Christmas Music in the background and a flurry of workers running around me:  Lisa (shipping dept.)  is currently looking for the Size Large Black Comfy Girl that has once again been moved back to the POD to make more room for our NEW ARRIVALS, Elizabeth is in the middle of a photo shoot, while trying to decide if we need to add a “flag” to some New Arrivals, flat ironing Becca’s Hair and talking to Mom on the phone, Annie is on the phone dealing with an upset customer, while another one is on hold, Lori is dealing with our staff who cannot fill out time cards properly, Nicci is unboxing boxes and tagging items as fast as they come in, Mom is ordering new earring and necklace cards because she thinks the ones that currently come on them are ugly and unoriginal AND she’s trying to name a necklace (that she’s tried to name all day), all while talking on the phone to Elizabeth (who’s in building right next to us) about staff Christmas Gifts,  Kate and Kortney are trudging through new waters beginning their "changed" media journey this week, and Deb is in the store greeting the Holiday Shoppers as they enter, because Jenn is home with a sick little one.  Yes, there is a lot of madness around me.  But do you know the main reason this madness is happening?   I do…it’s for you.  You, our customer.  I sit here in amazement at what all goes on around me.  Every person is working diligently to make something better for you.  It’s the roots of this business.  I have known my mom to go to GREAT LENGTHS to make something right for a customer, and I mean GREAT LENGTHS.  Tonight, we even have one of our employees driving an order to a customer in another town, to make "it right".  This is what we do.  What we want to do. We want to be the very best at servicing you.  Now with all of that said, do we make mistakes?? YES!!!!  We are human.  Things happen, human errors happen , it’s life. (But you better believe, we will do whatever we can to make it right)  I’m pretty sure not a one of us is perfect and lives an errorless life.  BUT...what today has me questioning do we REACT when ERRORS in life come up?  Do we let our EMOTIONS control us?

Why I’m saying all of this is not just about Glamour Farms…that was just my start…what got my mind thinking.  It’s more about us, us as humans and how we handle ourselves, our EMOTIONS.  When things are not perfect, go wrong, get hectic , people make us mad, our kids don’t do what they are supposed to, you wave at someone and they don’t wave back…. how do we handle our emotions?  The daily ups and downs of our emotions are one of the major struggles we as women all have deal with. Do you find yourself riding the emotional roller coaster?  Happy one minute, sad the next, ticked, excited, then crying at the end?  Yeah that might be a little extreme, but you get it, we are women, we all feel like this from time to time.   We let our emotions control us.  I know I have fallen victim to this nasty cycle.  For example, here was my morning (and I think I am pretty even keeled most of the time! Haha!):  This morning we woke up late, which you can imagine what that caused...lots of emotions, but we got out of the house without any major melt downs.  And Maggie and Torunn both got to school on time, so I was feeling pretty good about life.  I then went to GF and got my day started.  No one was there, but Lisa so it was QUIET, which is a rarity and allowed me to get a lot of work done before the madness began.  I worked in pure bliss for about 30 minutes and then decided I was sleepy and needed some caffeine so I DROVE to Caseys,  and yes, it's next door.  Most people would walk.  That could be part of my problem, but we won't discuss that right now.  :)  When I pull up to Caseys, I see that there are many people there I know. Emotions go into overdrive.  My mind goes wild.  I look terrible, I can't get out, I didn't even brush my hair this morning, they'll all think "look at that ugly Stephanie", what has happened to her, she doesn't take very good care of herself anymore...But, I thought, THIS IS STUPID STEPHANIE - get out of your car!  Who cares what they think.  But I do.  I always do. I care what everyone thinks.  But I got out and quickly raced through the door hoping the men talking outside didn't even notice me.  Many days I would just like to be invisible, this was definitely one of those days.  As I entered through the door I was beating myself up because I did not say Hello to the men standing outside talking, which I've grown up with and known my entire life.  I was so mad at myself...God would be so disappointed in you Stephanie...even a friendly smile woulda been a nice gesture.  No instead, I ignored them because of my own Vanity Shame and flew through the door.  And then at the soda fountain, I ran into my sweet, sweet friend, Cathi, who always knows just what to say to brighten a day.  A TRUE ANGEL ON EARTH she is.  So, I was feeling better.  I had my 32 oz Diet Coke in hand (which I am trying to stop) and was out the door.  As I was pulling away, a few of the men were still gathered talking, and this time I waved and smiled.  And in response to my wave one of the men gave me a slight " up head gesture".  No wave back, no smile back, no nothing, just a slight move of the head, but it was forced.  Once again EMOTIONS go crazy.  Why would he not like me, maybe he doesn't like Wade, maybe he thinks this, maybe he thinks that, maybe get the idea.  I let that simple gesture define much of the rest of my morning and overtake my thoughts.  And the reality of it is, maybe his head gesture was nothing, maybe he was deep in conversation, maybe he didn't see me wave, maybe he was having a bad start to his morning, maybe.  Maybe I shouldn't let my EMOTIONS control me. 

Life is no fun when we are controlled by  emotions and feelings. Feelings change from day to day, hour to hour, even moment to moment, as mine did this morning, and do on many days.   Not only do they change, they lie. For example, you may be in a crowd of people and feel that everybody is talking about you, but that doesn't mean they are. In fact they probably aren't even noticing you.  This morning as I was so worried about my outward appearance, I'm guessing no one even noticed me, yet I was completely obsessing over it. If we want to be life changing, mature, loving moms,  loving wives, and Godly women, we must be determined not to walk according to how we feel.

Emotions urge us toward haste, telling us that we must do something and do it right now! But godly wisdom tells us to wait until we have a clear picture of what it is we are to do and when we are to do it. We need to be able to back off and view our situation from God's perspective. We need to make decisions based on what we know rather than on what we feel. 

Let me give you another example from my own life. A few weeks ago, we were in Louisville, KY at a Panda Express.  And to make a long story short, imagine the worst customer service you've ever had and that was our experience.  One thing you should know about me is I HATE POOR CUSTOMER SERVICE.  It goes all through me.  And this place was POOR on about everything.  I took "the poorness" for a long time and then I LOST IT, I completely lost it.  And I kept losing it.  They continued to make one poor mistake after another.  But, we got our meal, ate cold food and left with promising to never return.  As I laid in bed that night, it all replayed in my head (as it always does)...Was it poor service, Absolutely.  Was the food cold, Yep.  Was the new food they made us cooked thoroughly, Nope.   Was the manager a beast, He Was.  Did I handle myself in a Godly Manner, Absolutely Not.  Was a proud of my behavior, Not Even.   Was it a good example to my girls or the other customers around me, No Way. Did I let God's Light shine through me, 100% No.   I let my EMOTIONS take control of my actions.  As I so often do.   Maybe they had been crazy busy prior to us coming in, maybe their regular employees had called in sick so they were short staffed, maybe something bad was happening in the Managers life.  Maybe.  So many different ways I should have handled that situation.  Emotions handled that situation, not Stephanie.

To close I just want to say, maybe we should start being a little wiser, stronger, God Like women.  When faced with anything that makes our EMOTIONS perk up, wait until you have a clear answer before taking a step that you may later regret. Emotions are wonderful, but they must not be allowed to take precedence over wisdom and knowledge. Remember—control your emotions instead of letting them control you.

Love & Many Blessings,

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